Team

A few minutes after the Cleveland Cavaliers’ season ended in 2010, LeBron James said he would take some time with his “team” to make some decisions about the offseason which lay ahead.

Only he didn’t mean the Cavaliers.

In a decidedly team sport, one in which David Stern has worked his tail off to ensure the egomaniac marketable superstar is exalted above the concept of a team, LeBron James takes the cake. He is, indeed, the King.

He is the King of Ego. He is the King of Selfish. He is the King of I Don’t Care About Anyone But LeBron James.

Instead of dedicating himself to trying as hard as possible to win titles, LBJ has decided that being a billion-dollar global icon is worth more, and he doesn’t care whom he has to step on to make that happen.

Basketball is, in fact, still a team game. The problem is, Maverick Carter isn’t as good in the post as Pau Gasol, and World Wide Wes can’t distribute the rock like Derek Fisher. But—make no mistake—those are the key players on Team James. Kobe can have Gasol and Fisher and the titles, and LeBron will take Carter and Wesley and fame. The only thing LeBron needs other basketball players for is so he has someone to blame when things fall apart.

LeBron will likely head off to Miami, and he may win titles there. But Dwyane Wade (who, incidentally, has 95% of LeBron’s talent but only 9.5% of his ego) will grow tired of LeBron’s selfish act. Heck, LBJ may stay in Cleveland and make himself a true hometown hero.

But his first team will always be Team Me.

I’ve never been much of an NBA fan, at least not since the days of Dominique Wilkins and that funny Hawks logo. But now that I’m a Cleveland resident, I’m a full-fledged Cavs fan. And this video is funny.